so the other big reason why i came to Las Vegas was James’s bachelor party which resulted in a great gnashing of teeth at the loss of many hundreds of US dollars. i’ll leave it at that and let you guys fill in the blanks yourselves.
the drive from Los Angeles to Las Vegas went by pretty quickly and the car drove pretty well even though the trunk and backseat were packed with Beka’s belongings. surprisingly, we made it here on much less than one tank of gas, averaging 40 miles per gallon. not bad for 10 year-old Mitsubishi Mirage, eh?
some advice to anyone out there who plans on becoming a landlord someday:
if one of your tenants has an issue that can only be attended to by you (receiving/returning keys, signing lease, etc) make sure you’re responsible enough to meet that need in a timely manner so that they don’t have to put their entire lives on hold for you.
giving your cellphone number and e-mail address to a tenant doesn’t mean anything if you never pick up or respond. if you’ve got a separate full-time job, try responding during your lunch break! it’s not like you have to carve your message in marble and find a thousand unblemished doves to fly it over; just type it out and hit ‘SEND,’ it only takes two seconds!
HIRE A REPUTABLE BUILDING MANAGER!
if you can’t be bothered to manage the building yourself, at least hire someone capable and competent to fill the position. for instance, don’t hire someone with the mental capacity of an unopened can of beans who never answers his phone either.
don’t ignore your tenants only to return their many phone calls with patronizing lies. make sure to answer their questions to the best of your ability or at least refer them to the reputable building manager who can. value your tenants and they’ll respect you; treat them like dirt and they’ll hate your guts and tell all of their friends about you.
it looks like we finally found a suitable sublessee to take over Beka’s apartment here in Los Angeles. with any luck, we can get her moved out by today and be on our way to Las Vegas tomorrow. fingers crossed!
one thing that really annoys me is having to depend on people. this annoyance is multiplied exponentially by incompetent idiots that have ZERO consideration for other people’s time. if i had things my way, there would be a “three strikes” program in place which would load repeat offenders onto a space capsule so they can be launched into the sun and recycled as fuel. justice and environmentalism all in one.
in an extremely rare case of impulse buying, i’ve purchased a bottle of “LENINADE” i found at a Japanese convenience store. i didn’t know of its existence beforehand nor was i looking for unusual drinks; it simply caught my eye and, before i knew it, i was handing over a wrinkled $20 bill with a silly grin on my face.
the beverage itself is vaguely tasty and wholly unremarkable. the packaging, however, is ruthlessly gaudy and oh so lovable. the bottle is completely plastered with lines like “GET HAMMERED & SICKLED!,” “DRINK COMRADE! DRINK! IT’S THIS OR THE GULAG!,” and “BEWARE THE REPRESSED COMMUNIST PARTY ANIMAL WHO IS REALLY A PROLETARIAN IN DENIAL MASQUERADING AS A BOURGEOIS COLD WAR MONGER!” while the underside of the bottlecap urges me to collect all 72 “Leninade caps” to become a “HERO CUSTOMER of the Soviet Legacy!”
this week’s video is of a garbage monster having breakfast in Amsterdam. shortly after shooting this video, i came across a dead pigeon whose head had evidently exploded during the previous night.
as i squatted there marveling at how the still-intact eyeballs floated neatly atop the mound of splattered brains, i barely noticed the garbage monster’s return until it was only a few meters away. i jumped up and backed away just in time to see the pigeon corpse get sucked up into the monster’s cavernous belly.
so we’ve been trying to sublet Beka’s place for a few weeks now but haven’t had much luck. i suppose the biggest problem i’ve noticed is that people try to be cheap and picky at the same time; they want nine trillion square feet, a spectacular view and a private parking spot at a bare minimum.
there was a girl who didn’t want to start her own utilities account, a lady who turned this place down because of “bad energy,” a raggedy-haired ‘artist’ who said the apartment would stifle his creativity, an idiot who complained that he couldn’t feel an ocean breeze through the closed windows and about a dozen others who refused to pay a security deposit. jerks!