taking off in a few hours. see you guys on friday.

i was watching the “soup nazi” episode of “Seinfeld” on my computer when it gave me a monstrous craving for soup. i was already pretty hungry so i lumbered downstairs searching for some of the tomato persuasion.

tomato soup rocks. not many people know this, but i’m quite partial to tomato soup.especially when it’s tomato soup with alphabet pasta. mmm…good stuff. =d

so naturally, i was horrified to learn that we were fresh out of tomato soup. but i DID find a can of tomato juice…which, when it comes down to it, doesn’t taste all that much different from lukewarm tomato soup. so i poured myself a cup and heated it up in the microwave. it was a really fake soup but i’d have to say that it wasn’t half bad. could’ve used a few letters though.

for those of you that don’t know, i’ll be going to michigan from July 27th to August 1st to help out with a Christian camp for inner city kids. if you guys want, you can write me ENCOURAGING letters. (if you do, try to send them out before July 27th to allow for delivery). you can reach me at this address.

ivanlo
c/o Camp Beechpoint
3212 - 125th ave.
Allegan, MI 49010

i was channel surfing yesterday when i flipped to the speed channel where they were broadcasting NASCAR races. so dumb! ah yes…america’s incompetence shines through once again.

European and Japanese racing series have always been on tough, curvy tracks such as Tsukuba and Nurburgring where missing the apex of a single turn could very well cost you the race. but despite the many mishaps that may occur, the accident rate is surprisingly low due to the skill exhibited by the top notch drivers who are capable of racing full throttle in rain or shine.

on the flip side…

if you’ve ever seen a NASCAR race, then you know that they race in a big loop. dag yo…a loop??? don’t you think that maybe it’s a little too much for them to handle? i mean…they’re going to have to make turns, yo. oh yeah…and if you’ve ever seen a NASCAR commercial, then you know they like to glorify wrecks and crashes. you know what i’m talking about…one guy spins out (for no apparent reason) and then before you know it, half the cars on the “track” are twirling about in a huge mess of tire smoke and automotive garbage. now THAT’s something to be proud of.

if the world is balanced and everything has direct opposites, then i wonder who Blade’s antithesis would be. my guess is that he would be some lanky white kid who’s also half vampire and half human, but exhibits the worst traits of both races.

basically the whole movie would be about this poor guy (let’s name him Gus) who continually gets the crap beaten out of him. instead of seeking out vampires and destroying them like blade, Gus spends most of his time hiding from vampires in fears of them destroying him. but alas, he is not so lucky. with his sub-human strength, gus tries to defend himself against his enemies but ends up pummeled into the ground. broken and bruised, his foes leave him outside as the sun rises, dealing him multiple third degree burns to his exposed (and pasty white) skin before he can drag himself into the shade. then after a dozen or so smaller beating scenes, the movie ends with a massive final beating which finally puts an end to Gus’ tragically brief life.

sorry, Gus.

http://www.angelfire.com/pa3/toplesscarwashdoc/tattooartist.html

i have a sudden urge to become a tattoo artist.

i usually try to avoid driving when it’s raining but in the event that i have no choice, i enjoy driving with the windows down. actually, my windows are always down since i never use air conditioning (it robs the engine of power and efficiency). so yeah…there ain’t nothin’ like driving with the windows down. it’s like a cheap alternative to a convertible.

anyways, back to the windows-down driving through rain thing…it’s great. i encourage you all to try it at least once. i’ve done it many times and you know what? if you drive fast enough, most of the rain doesn’t even make it inside the car. and another thing…it beats the snot out of air conditioning (in terms of cooling). if you think cold air blasting in your face is refreshing, try MISTY cold air blasting in your face! it’s like sitting on a cow-shaped ice sculpture while drinking generic brand cream soda and watching “Seinfeld” reruns. you’ll love it.

why do 7-11’s have locks on the doors? i mean, it’s open 24/7 right? am i right??? thought so. anyways, back to my initial question. why the do 7-11’s doors have locks on them? there’s no reason to lock it, is there? maybe…just MAYBE the store will close on such holidays as Christmas and Thanksgiving where the doors will need to be locked. but do you know what i say to that? i say that you are not a true hardcore 7-11 franchisee if you have to close the store for ANY reason. i suppose you can compare owning a 7-11 to being a mail carrier. does inclement weather stop the mailman from delivering mail? NO! the mailman overcomes all odds (usually with the aide of his/her bulging biceps and buns of titanium) to deposit loads of junkmail in the mangled old metal paint can that you call a “mailbox”. so, following the example of the courageously foolish mailman…all truly honorable 7-11 owners should make the effort to keep the store open every single scarf-licking day! everyone would abide by this simple standard in a truly utopian society, but alas…this is not the case…and i find it rather unfortunate because until this dream is realized…until all 7-11 owners see the light, the frail convenience store world will remain hopelessly lost in the cold, dark expanse we know as “Ohio”. boo hoo.

getting my fix today in the city. woohoo!

i got my hands on a bootleg DVD of The Two Towers and decided to watch parts of it tonight. i had just finished a DVD full of “Initial D” episodes so the english subtitles option was still on when i popped in “Two Towers.” the result? the accidental discovery of fobby english subtitles.

that’s right…the english subtitles were merely re-translated versions of the Chinese subtitles. as can be expected, the grammar and spelling was horrible. what wasn’t expected, however, was the added swears.

i was DYING WITH LAUGHTER.

i guess the language wasn’t crude enough so the subtitle author(s) decided to spice it up with a few curses and “liberal paraphrasing.” what also made me laugh was how they translated the names of races (elves, orcs, hobbits, etc…) and i’ll end the entry with this screenshot.

“we’re not orcs! we’re hobbits!”