well, tomorrow’s summercamp. to be honest? this one crept up on me. i decided after springcamp 2002 that i wasn’t going to do anything for summercamp this year. fun eh? so yeah…i didn’t realize how close summercamp was until well, it’s less than a day away. i’m not ready…heck, i’m not even packed but i guess i don’t really have to be ready. God is independent of my attitude! hallelujah for that…

in other news, in conjunction with JKuo’s recent blog, i also had a WA (Weird Account) today. i was with gina today bumming around the picasso downtown when we came upon a large banner that announced that it was “China Day”. weeee! there were a bunch of a little booths set up with various vendors selling their respective goods. one of these little tents just happened to belong to one of gina’s old friend’s mom. weird huh? gina hasn’t seen/spoke to/heard from either mother nor daughter for a while now so they were surprised to see each other. they talked for a bit but gina never introduced me. then suddenly the lady looked up at me and asked “so ivan, are you going to UMich with gina?”

now how in the world did she know my name?

so Lundy got married and my brother and his friends made a wedding video for him. they dressed in suits and sunglasses. my brother gave Brian my sunglasses. fine with me right? it’s all good. the thing was that my brother didn’t bother telling me that he lent them out. i didn’t even notice they were missing until i was looking for them one day. i couldn’t find them and so i went to ask Dan where they were. “uh, Brian has them.” oh okay, Brian has them. wait, Brian is in D.C. for the summer. greeeeaaaat. for the longest time i tried to locate my glasses. i knew they were in one of two places: Lisle or D.C. after months of half-hearted search and harassing Mandy, i recently found out that they were in Washington. as luck would have it, my brother was in the area for the weekend! score! i asked Mandy to call her brother and tell him to give my sunglasses to Dan. yes! my brother came home last night and i asked for my sunglasses and he gave them to me.

cool huh? yeah! except they aren’t my sunglasses. booooo!

“Mickey Blue Eyes” is kind of lame.

you know what really annoys me? when the tired, tattoo-covered mailman takes your outgoing mail, puts incoming letters in your mailbox but forgets to put the stupid flag down. there have been many times when i’ve looked outside at 3pm and seen the little red flag still up. i’d think to myself “stupid mailman! where’s my mail? it should’ve been here by now!” then i repeat the process at 4pm and 5pm and then i finally get mad and walk outside at 6pm. “what the heck??? no mail today? flag’s still up. just let me check to make sure…” i say to myself as i impatiently open the mailbox…and what do i see inside?

MAIL!

i just found out that i have a second canker sore on the inside of my upper lip to keep the one on my lower lip company. those fools! soon they shall be crushed with an onslaught of increased water consumption. that’ll show ‘em…heh heh heh. so yeah…canker sores. funny…i didn’t know what a canker sore was until not too long ago. now i know that a canker sore is what i know as a “huo chi”. i used to hear the term “canker sore” and think that it must be something only whiteboys get. but i was younger and dumber back then. now i’m just young and dumb. cool huh? welp, these huo chi brothers are driving me up the wall. i’m gonna go beat them silly.

i was going down the spooky part of Woodward avenue when i saw four headlights coming from behind. i instantly recognized it as a WRX due to it’s circular headlights and similar foglights underneath. the fool switched on his high beams and then abruptly turned them off when he realized that i was in front of him. dork! then he continued to turn his brights on for five second intervals and then off again. dork! he pulled up beside me as we were stopped at the light and i recognized the WRX as the one from my neighborhood. as the light turned green, he slowly pulled ahead and i heard the “tssss” from his blowoff valve. ugh, i wish i had a WRX. i then proceeded to tailgate him the whole way home because of his dorky light-operating habits. dork!

today was a boring day. no wait, i take that back…it was a very boring day. ah…that’s better. what can i say? it was the first day i hadn’t gone out in a looong time. and a long day it was. i was so bored that i started making a list on my palm pilot of all the cars i have in GT2. sad huh? i think so too. (the bright side is that now i know that i own 11 Skylines…which makes me feel better because i really don’t own any) i think my cold-winter clothes have mysteriously resurfaced by themselves because i just looked at my bed and i see three (3) hooded sweatshirts. i wasn’t even aware that i owned that many. funny how life plays those little tricks on you…then laughs hysterically when you fall for them. well…the clock in the lower right hand corner of my desktop is reading 1:27am and here i am once again…robotically blogging like the iron pawn that i am (i’m more like a chrome-plated plastic really). time to go dunk my arms in paint.

before and after pictures are so bogus. they do this whole dramatic photoshoot in order to convince you that the product they’re selling actually works. too bad the people in the two pictures usually look nothing alike. either that, or it’s obvious that the picture has been modified because the two pictures are almost identical (same exact pose, clothes and background) except one is bald, frowning and horribly obese and the other isn’t.

our president has an abnormally small right hand. see dubya with small hand. dubya mad…dubya very mad.

bush now has a larger, firmer hand…thanks to MonsterHand cream! here he is after weeks of using our patented hand-enlarging ointment as well as undergoing multiple sessions of painful (and unnecessary) surgery. see how happy he is?

caution: do not address improperly, enrage or dispose of in fire. ivan may explode or leak.
no, i’m not from Canada.
i feel like driving.
i want to weave in and out of traffic while going 20 over.
i want to waste some gangly white kid in his POS saturn.
i want to box in american cars and smile grimly at their pissed drivers.
hmm…time for some GT2 action.

i was oo-ing and ah-ing at Mandy’s (er..her dad’s) brand-spankin’ new 2002 five-speed Camry SE when she shows me this little button on her remote. “PANIC” it reads. now as i understand (and as she later demonstrated), the car repeatedly flashes its lights and honks its horn when this particular button is pushed. it is also my understanding that this button is best used when you yourself (esteemed holder of keys and driver of car) are in a state of panic. dictionary.com defines “panic” as “a sudden, overpowering terror, often affecting many people at once.” now i ask you this: if you were panicking (say you were being chased by a pack of wild goats or perhaps a chain-smoking dinosaur), what would pressing the button do for YOU? you’re probably already scared out of your mind…do you think flashing lights and loud, obtrusive noises are going to help your situation? i think not! wouldn’t your pursuers already be deterred from chasing you if you’re screaming (don’t lie…you know you would be) at the top of your lungs??? the only reason you would use the panic button would be if those in pursuit didn’t stop chasing you, right? to be frank, if your obnoxious screaming doesn’t stop them…lights and noises won’t either. my advice: carry mace or a butterfly knife.